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FactOfTheDay: Isolation
posted by dennisn on December 31st, 2014 at 4:26PM

Social isolation is twice as bad for you as being obese and nearly as bad as smoking.
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posted by dennisn on March 14th, 2015 at 1:25PM

Research from Holt-Lunstad and Smith puts the heightened risk of mortality from loneliness in the same category as smoking 15 cigarettes a day and being an alcoholic.

posted by jenni on January 1st, 2015 at 11:32PM

One feels less isolated when one has good music :)

https://www.youtube.com/wa...ch?v=7Mz5AEgE24o

posted by dennisn on January 3rd, 2015 at 2:01PM

(Also, update your email address here, in case your fans want to be able to reach you directly.)

posted by jenni on January 3rd, 2015 at 2:14PM

That email still exists and will forward things to my main email (which I am still testing, so I want to keep the old one as a back up).

posted by dennisn on January 2nd, 2015 at 5:16PM

What do you think he meant by "I'm ashamed of the person I am"?

posted by jenni on January 3rd, 2015 at 2:10PM

Perhaps his parents placed unhealthy expectations on him so whenever he does not live up to those expectations he feels shame for not completing the narrative set upon him as to how his life should go. Perhaps his lack of control over his epilepsy (which was a major issue for him psychologically, according to the documentaries I have seen) led to feelings of shame/humiliation because he was not fitting into the box of what a man 'should' be. The 'should be' concept leads to a lot of self hate for many people.

I think the mind focuses on/develops a pattern that leads to negative emotions for two reasons. One being that paying attention to the negative emotions is a survival mechanism so the next time a situation arises that invokes negative emotions we are prepared for it. Ie: if I assume there is a bear (the worst case scenario) in the woods and not a rabbit I can prepare myself to fight/flight, whereas I do not need to prepare for the rabbit as it will not kill me/invoke negative emotions. Another reason could be the lack of healthy bonding as a child with the parents which can lead to various defense mechanisms to further detach from other people or from the self. Such as physical isolation from others or mental isolation from others, intellectualizing things to validate isolation, aversion to change (which also comes down to survival/insecurities in the unknown) in lifestyle choices, etc.

Feeding the narrative of self hate/shame as opposed to accepting the narrative as a deeply internalized thought pattern and changing it for a realistic/healthy one leads to a downward spiral of negative emotions which leads to the sad demise that is Ian Curtis' story.

posted by dennisn on January 4th, 2015 at 6:57AM

Agreed. Specifically, I think this survival mechanism is designed to make us conform to social expectations (parental, et cetera), and underpins our herding mentality, and our deep sense of morality. It would be really messed up if this gets coopted for conforming to shallow/unhealthy ends, as it usually does :s. (I think this is why most people recoil and reject the idea of good vs evil (eg. Karina), since such pressure was used invalidly against them in youth.)

It is messed up that many peop by jenni on January 4th, 2015 at 1:33PM.
"and most of the answers are t by dennisn on January 5th, 2015 at 5:49AM.
One person once told me they c by jenni on January 5th, 2015 at 9:23PM.
I think here is where Molyneux by dennisn on January 6th, 2015 at 6:17AM.
I think that is too conditiona by jenni on January 6th, 2015 at 3:42PM.

posted by dennisn on December 31st, 2014 at 4:33PM

Prairie voles isolated from their partners then placed in an open field explore their surroundings less and concentrate on predator evasion.

posted by dennisn on December 31st, 2014 at 4:30PM

Robin Williams: "I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone."